IF YOUR name’s not down, you’re coming in – not even if your name is Tom Alexander, chief executive of Everything Everywhere, and you are trying to get in to your own party at Glastonbury.

As the other partygoers got stuck in to the free drinks inside the VIP farmhouse rented by the mobile phone giant for the festival, Alexander was left on hold outside in the rain, as the bouncer refused to believe he was the CEO hosting the invitation-only affair.

Nothing could convince the gatekeeper – not even inside knowledge of the official Glastonbury mobile app provided by Everything Everywhere – so, in a last-ditch bargaining attempt, the bouncer suggested: “Okay, if you’re really Tom Alexander, you’ll have a top-of-the-range mobile phone.”

Unfortunately, the man who led Orange through its merger with T-Mobile to preside over the telecommunications empire with more than 700 high street stores and a customer base of 27m only carries an old Motorola handset.

If an Everything Everywhere PR hadn’t turned up in the nick of time to persuade the disbelieving bouncer of his boss’s telecoms pedigree, who knows what could have happened to Alexander that evening…

TO THE Foreign and Commonwealth Office for Sky’s summer party last night – but not for business secretary Vince Cable, whose invitation is still in the post following his declaration of war on BSkyB’s would-be full owner Rupert Murdoch.

Also giving the party a miss was culture minister Jeremy Hunt, who is at pains to be seen to be completely independent from Sky’s senior figures as his decision on whether Murdoch can win complete control of BSkyB moves into the end game.

In fact, the position is so sensitive that Sky wouldn’t even confirm whether Hunt had been invited. “Even if we had that information, we wouldn’t share it with you,” said a stonewalling Sky spinner.

So who did make the party hosted by the broadcaster’s chief executive Jeremy Darroch? News Corp heir James Murdoch, Credit Suisse media banker Gillian Sheldon and Numis executive director Lorna Tilbian.

A DIPLOMATIC crisis was solved at City Hall yesterday at the launch of Boris Johnson’s Team London, the £4.5m volunteering scheme backed by business giants including Barclays, Bloomberg, Citigroup and KMPG.

“When people say which London team do I support – Spurs, Chelsea, West Ham – I can now say Team London,” said the London mayor (pictured below with the scheme’s supporter Samantha Cameron) on the programme that will “bring the village to the city” by recruiting 10,000 community volunteers to six large-scale projects.

Inevitably, the grass-roots project drew comparisons with David Cameron’s much-criticised Big Society. “Is the prime minister pleased to see a physical manifestation of his Big Society in action?” wondered one City Hall guest as Boris fielded questions from the floor.

“These are philosophical questions,” hedged the mayor. “Even if you think the Big Society is some kind of obesity project, you can still join Team London – it is simply a practical exercise to get people volunteering.” So that’s a no, then.

SEPARATED at birth: Price-WaterhouseCoopers partner Geoff Lane and actor Richard Gere of Pretty Woman and Indecent Proposal fame.

The “uncanny likeness” was discovered at this week’s AGM of PwC’s climate change team, where partner Richard Gledhill was compared to Studio 54 scenester Andy Warhol between discussions on corporate sustainability.

The Capitalist was also going to bring you the two PwC employees who bear a spooky resemblance to George Osborne and singer Nicole Scherzinger – until the Big Four auditor’s fearsome legal team vetoed the idea. Disappointing.

CALLING all wine lovers: 1 Lombard Street is launching its new Wine Society next Monday, 4 July, with an American Independence Day wine tasting celebrating “the American Greats”.

Head sommelier Matthew Mawtus will present five of America’s best vintages, accompanied by an American-themed menu created by chef Herbert Berger. Email Elena Leva at to reserve a place.