FIRST we had divorce “gift vouchers”, with a company charging £125 for half an hour with a lawyer; now, it’s divorce apps for your iPhone.

Dallas-based company Brainwash already offers one divorce application in its range – a “Cost & Prep” product for just under ten dollars, explaining to would-be divorcees how much it costs to un-hitch yourself from an unwanted spouse. But I see the firm has now gone one better than that and is peddling a second app, the “Estate Divider”, providing planning tools for couples preparing to divvy up their assets.

Somewhat worryingly, it also says there are a couple more offerings in development – including the “Child Possession Calendar” to show dates and times when you’ve got the kids and to facilitate communicating with your ex about changing days, and a “Support Calculator” to work out how much money you’ll have to pay (or be paid) for the ongoing financial upkeep of said sprogs.

As easy as one, two, three…

It looks like Andrew Monk, one of the better-known names in the stockbroking community, may be readying himself for a proper comeback.

Monk originally set up Oriel Securities – named after his old Oxford college – in 2002. He then left to join Corporate Synergy, another stockbroking firm which was renamed “Blue Oar Securities” (after his Oxford rowing progress) within the blink of an eye.

After a few years and an acrimonious takeover battle with Edward Vandyk, the man who himself renamed Blue Oar to Astaire before stepping down a few weeks ago, Monk disappeared from City life for a while. He eventually popped up last autumn at a little software firm Formjet, a vehicle with which he’s rumoured to be sniffing around smaller stockbroking groups in the City with a view to a potential tie-up in the future.

Whatever the eventual outcome, Monk is certainly a creature of habit. In a move which he somehow managed to keep entirely under the radar for a good few months, he has rechristened Formjet as “Third Quad Capital”, after one of Oriel’s impressive quadrangles.

A soothing end to the longest day of the year yesterday in the City, courtesy of the City of London Festival.

The festival, which began yesterday and lasts until well into July, organised a circle of 21 pianos to be placed in the Guildhall Yard, each one lit up by two large candles.

Young pianists from the Guildhall School of Music and Drama proceeded to spend an hour in the late evening playing a work specially commissioned by the festival organisers to mark the 200th anniversary of Frederic Chopin – a compilation of excerpts from his
Nocturnes, composed by Richard Causton.

Browsing around t’internet yesterday in preparation for today’s emergency Budget, The Capitalist chanced upon a bizarre message bar at the bottom of accountancy giant PricewaterhouseCoopers’ global Web homepage.

“A Budget for growth, Darling? Everything you need to know about the UK Budget,” it proclaimed, proudly.

Luckily, at least the web content experts in Blighty were on the ball. Clicking through on the link led to a UK emergency Budget subsite with the header “A Budget, by George!”

Considerable kudos for millionaire entrepreneur Peter Dubens at the weekend, after he was named “man of the match” at former Lloyds chairman Sir Victor Blank’s annual charity cricket match at Chippinghurst Manor.

The former founder of broadband provider Pipex managed an impressive batting performance, including hitting two consecutive sixes against former West Indian international Brian Lara.

He showed off his skills in front of a diverse array of cricketing greats (Michael Atherton, Adam Gilchrist, Jeff Thompson et al) and business contacts, including WPP boss Sir Martin Sorrell and fellow entrepreneur Nigel Wray.

Finally, a World Cup result for the punters to celebrate rather than the bookies. After ten days of lacklustre performances from the so-called favourites of the competition, out came Portugal yesterday in a blistering 7-0 defeat of North Korea.

Sporting Index claim to have lost three quarters of a million quid on that one match alone, due to betters buying goals, Portugal supremacy, shirt numbers and goal minutes.

Still, that must be a drop in the ocean compared to what they must have won on the various uninspiring showings in the tournament so far, from England, Germany, Italy, France et al.