Episode 32: Sleepless in the City – a day in the life with baby twins

00.00 Gabriella doesn’t “do” nights. Seems it’s an opportunity for babies and parents to bond. So one day ends and another begins with Emma and me feeding the twins.

01.45 Ditto – after an hour’s sleep.

02.15 Harry has colic. I pace the darkened bedroom with him wailing into my shoulder. Emma sleeps soundly.

03.15 Feeding AGAIN.

06.00 Noel bounds into our bedroom. Emma affixes Gwenllian to her breast and suggests I make Noel breakfast. I mutter something about Maria.

07.00 Noel is fed, washed, dressed and we’re reading “My dad goes into space”. Maria and Gabriella emerge. Emma descends, one wailing twin in each arm. We grunt at one another.

07.30 Emma and I slip back to bed.

09.15 For 90 minutes I discuss the current deal with Juliette. Fear I’m barely coherent.

11.00 I dress. Emma and I take the twins for a walk. Grab a coffee. Feed twins.

12.00 Nick calls. I decline becoming chairman of his company. Offer to help, informally, with negotiations. Then find myself offering to invest. Foolish. After 90 minutes, we agree to meet next week.

14.00 Unbelievable. Emma has arranged for a party planner to visit to discuss my forthcoming 40th. I feel 80. Am rude.
15.30 Noel’s home. Computer, television, homework, dinner, bath and bedtime stories ensue. It’s a breeze. Meanwhile, Emma, Maria and Gabriella outnumber the twins and survive the afternoon.

20.00 Noel’s asleep. The Dynamic Duo are off duty. The twins feed. Breasts and bottles. They don’t seem fussy. Just insatiable.

21.00 Emma and I sit in front of the television, eating, one twin on each of our laps. No idea what we’re watching.

21.59 In bed. The twins have fed and slept all evening. Now they want to play.

00.00 Drowning. Not swimming. Thankfully, paternity leave ends on Friday.

City Dad will be continued next Tuesday. For previous episodes, see www.cityam.com