In last night's episode candidates attempted a brand new task: crowdfunding some cycling products.
Essentially, all they had to do was set up a crowdfunding page, pull off a snazzy PR stunt at a train station and pitch the products, which were already good, to some bike shops. Easy, right?
Wrong, because even simple tasks are rendered impossible in the world of The Apprentice. Here's what happened...
There were some dodgy PR stunts
Commuting is hard enough. Even if you manage to avoid constant rail strikes, you also have to dodge a bunch of troublemakers from The Apprentice mucking around in Waterloo station.
That choreography for a cycling task was as about as clear as Lance Armstrong urine sample— Lord Sugar (@Lord_Sugar) November 3, 2016
Also, just a suggestion, lads, but if you’re in a busy train station, silent interpretive dance may not be the best way to attract attention. One of them even staged a fender bender. It was painful viewing.
You wouldn't know they were a bunch of marketing "experts".
Lord Sugar finally acknowledged crowdfunding
But he said it like he didn’t really know what it meant.
Not everyone can take several months out of their lives to take part in a televised seed funding application to Alan Sugar. This episode he mentioned an alternative: crowdfunding, which proved successful for anti-Brexit campaigners yesterday.
Karthik got through by the skin of his teeth
As charming to his fellow candidates as ever, Lord Sugar rolled his eyes when Karthik claimed he had a "creative streak". He did manage to make waves during the pitch though - which in this task was all that mattered.
Karthick ranting is so irritating even the Jehovah witnesses avoid his house— Lord Sugar (@Lord_Sugar) November 3, 2016
And spoiler - he's lived to see another boardroom meeting.
They spelled "gilet" wrong while trying to flog a gilet
F7, people, that’s all it takes for a simple spell check. And your iPad does it automatically, so there’s really no excuse.
The products they were selling were actually quite good
Rare for The Apprentice, and probably because the candidates themselves didn't come up with the ideas, this episode's products looked like genuinely useful bits of kit.
One was a trendy Tron-esque light-up cycle jacket, while the other team had bone conduction headphones. Handy for when that new cycle highway opens.
Would you put your product in the hands of this lot? I suppose all publicity is good publicity...
Everyone was terrible at maths...again
Buy 12, get 40% off.— The Apprentice (@bbcapprentice) November 3, 2016
Buy 180, get 40% off.
Best bulk buy deal ever! #theapprentice
Once more, some candidates proved basic maths just isn’t something they can offer Lord Sugar. One team offered the same discounts to bulk buyers as to small independent retailers. Good job...
And finally, there was a decent winners’ treat
It’s hard not to feel sorry for this lot. Hated by 5m people every week for two months must be difficult to take.
So when they actually got a good prize (Michelin starred food, no less), after episodes of lindy hopping, a bit of croquet, and a week of no rewards, it seemed fair enough.
They did have to cook it themselves, though. Lord Sugar must be trying to keep them humble.