1. Go and see some filthy cabaret at the Hippodrome
Cabaret, Hippodrome, Saturday, 19.30, from £15-£50
Inspired by 1930s Parisian cabaret but also swiping at the mainstream success of Cirque du Soleil, this is a sassy combination of smut and sparkle.
2. Remember your childhood watching The BFG
Film, IMAX Waterloo, Saturday, 11.15, £20
A saccharine-sweet adaptation of the classic kid’s book by master of schmaltz Steven Spielberg.
3. Or go and see an art film about a tiger instead
Film, Picturehouse Central, Saturday, 14.20, £8
An arthouse picture about Antoine Yates, who kept a Bengal tiger in his fifth floor New York apartment, until it tried to eat his leg.
4. Enjoy the beauty and absurdity of everyday life with William Eggleston
Photography, National Portrait Gallery, all weekend, £6.50
The pioneering American photographer brings together a collection of more than 100 of his enigmatic portraits dating from the 60s to the present day.
5. Geek out watching the new Star Trek
Film, Everyman Canary Wharf, all weekend, 11.30, 14.40, 17.30, 12.00, £19.20
Simon Pegg writes the latest pop-culture strewn instalment of the interminable Star Trek franchise, starring Idris Elba as the baddie.
6. Get your politics Fix
Theatre, Union Theatre, Saturday 14.30, 19.30, Sunday 14.30, £25
Musical theatre meets House of Cards in The Fix, a play about a political dynasty’s attempts to transform the tearaway son of a dead governor into a successful candidate.
7. Learn about London’s great big fire
Exhibition, The Museum of London, all weekend, £8
350 years ago London burned to the ground after someone set fire to a rogue pasty. Today you can see the charred remains of that very pasty at this new exhibition. At least that’s what we think you can see.
8. Relive the London Olympics at the Anniversary Games
Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park, all weekend, from £12
Remember how fast all of the men and women ran in 2012? How high they jumped? How far they threw? Of course you don’t, but this weekend you can shine a light into your memory-folds at the Anniversary Games, where Usain Bolt is the star attraction.
9. And then go to the beach without leaving Stratford
BeachEast, Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park, all weekend, £2
What could be better than combining shopping with sand? Nothing. Literally nothing. So head down to this urban beach and sprawl in the sand, making everybody else envious.
10. Feed your appetite for street food
Food Fest, Red Market, Shoreditch, all weekend, free
All four varieties of food are available here: pizza, ribs, curry and “other”. Hoover them all into your gaping maw at this lovely little food festival, where you can get three dishes for just £8.
11. Watch ET in the sunshine then go down a massive slide
Festival, Alexandra Palace, Saturday 11.00-22.00, Free
Alexandra Palace’s Summer Festival returns for a second year with DJ Yoda spinning the tunes, an outdoor screening of Spielberg’s sci-fi classic, a silent disco in the woods and a 100m water slide